The Red Zone (A Big Play Novel Book 2) Read online

  “Oh, come on. You know it wasn’t about that. We were pranking each other. Yes, it may have been a really bizarre way of flirting, but you were into it…until yesterday.”

  I try to read her expression, but she goes blank on me, giving me nothing. Her eyes dart to the pictures on the wall, cartoon depictions of famous musicians from the fifties and sixties. I glance at the pencil sketches before turning back to study her. The smooth lines of her long face are taut and unrelenting while her neck muscles strain.

  She’s fighting the urge to look at me.

  I settle in and keep staring, unwilling to lose this standoff.

  The stubborn beauty makes me wait it out until I eventually sigh and shift in my seat. “I was going to offer you a truce yesterday. You know, after you laughed and called me an asshole for scaring you.” I scratch the back of my neck, hopefully looking sheepish and remorseful. “That’s what I’d been expecting, anyway. Why’d you freak out so bad?”

  She clenches her jaw, her eyes still on the wall. “I can’t do this anymore. You won, okay?”

  “So, you’ll go out with me?” I grin.

  Her eyes snap to mine. Wow. Even the frown wrinkling her face is pretty.

  I snicker. “That’d be a win for me.”

  Her fingers quiver as she rubs her forehead. “I meant I’m thinking of going home early. So, you know, you’ve won. I’m out of your school.”

  “What?” I jerk in my seat. “No, I don’t want that. I…I don’t want that at all. I’ve been trying to get to know you better, not chase you away.”

  Her flaring nostrils and the way she’s bunching her chin tells me that she knows this already.

  “Why won’t you let me in?” I reach for her hand, but she snatches it back, shuffling out of the booth and grabbing her bag. “Wait.” I grab her wrist before she can disappear again.

  The move freezes both of us. We stare at each other for a minute and then her eyes slowly track down to my fingers wrapped around her slender wrist. I rub my thumb over her pulse, loving the softness of her skin.

  “You can’t leave,” I whisper. “Please stay. I want you to stay.”

  Her eyes glass over, turning them a vibrant green, like new leaves in the springtime. Wriggling her wrist free, she tucks her hand into her sweater pocket and runs out the door.

  I should chase her, but I’ll probably end up pushing her even further away.

  Slumping back with a huff, I tap my nail on the hard table before running my thumb over the pads of my fingers. I touched her and, just as I expected, it changed everything.

  From the first time I saw Kaija Bennett, I wanted her.

  And now I feel like I need her.

  #18:

  Determination Disintegration

  Kaija

  I don’t know what’s going on with me right now. How is it possible that Anderson’s touch creeped me out whereas Mack’s ignited something within me—a hot, burning addiction I can’t stop thinking about. I wanted to stay in that deserted restaurant with Mack’s hand around my wrist, his soft hold making me feel more secure than I have since finding Eloise on my bed…or even since the day Eloise left me to go overseas.

  But I can’t go there.

  Mack is too much like Hanson, and that guy brought out the worst in me.

  But the look on Mack’s face when he pleaded with me to stay… I never once saw that look on Hanson’s face. There’s a sweetness and depth to Mack that I want to discover.

  I rub my head with a frustrated huff.

  On Sunday, I forced myself to hang out with the Fosters. We went for a hike—it was beautiful, the view breathtaking—and all I could think about was Mack.

  Anderson didn’t say anything about trying to get a little cozy in my bedroom, and I was happy never to mention it again. Spending another six weeks with them was going to be torture if he tried to make another move.

  Friends—yes. Something more—no offense, but I can’t stomach it. As much as I want Anderson to be one of my new people, he isn’t. My heart doesn’t triple-thump when I’m around him, I don’t feel that buzz or urge to be with him…ever. There’s only one person who has that effect on me.

  A smile toys with my lips as I walk through the double doors and into the fluorescent-lit hallway of Nelson High. Looks like I’m staying a little longer than I thought.

  As much as I want to, I don’t seek Mack out. I’m still not sure what I want to say to him or how I want this thing to play out. The war inside me is catastrophic. My natural instincts are tearing my resolve to shreds. Is it simply impossible for me to be someone new? To join a crowd I don’t belong in?

  I cringe and head for the library. Although I technically don’t have to pass any of my classes while I’m here, I don’t want to be the only person who hasn’t handed in their homework, either. Slumping into a table near the back corner, I pull out my books and slap them down.

  “Shhh!” The girl across the table glares at me. I think she’s one of Anderson’s friends.

  I give her a relax kind of expression, which only makes her glare harder. Bulging my eyes, I dip my head and get to work. Trying to concentrate is really hard. My mind keeps wandering to Mack.

  Mack. Mack. Mack.

  Before I know it, I’ve stopped writing and am running my fingers over the spot on my wrist where his thumb gently caressed me.

  This is insane!

  I’m not this kind of girl. I don’t go gooey. How can one touch turn me into this sappy, lovesick mess?

  When we were kids, Eloise and I used to dream about meeting these hot guys. It’d only take one look from them to fall madly in love with us and we’d live happily ever after. I quickly figured out that dreams like that don’t come true. So why is it happening to me now, especially when I least deserve it?

  “You keep rubbing circles on your wrist like that and you’re going to leave a permanent mark.”

  I glance up, already fighting a smile. Mack’s standing there with a knowing grin…a proud, cocky grin. I tuck my wrist beneath the table. I have no defense. He totally caught me daydreaming about his touch on my skin. He knows it. I know it. So all I can say is, “What are you doing in a library?”

  Mack takes a seat beside me. “I’ll have you—”

  “Shhh!” Miss Grump-a-lot glares at me again.

  Mack’s smile is charming and sweet. “Sorry about that.”

  Her expression softens, a light blush touching her skin. I roll my eyes and give him a dry frown. He winks at me, his soft, deep chuckle kissing the edge of my face. “I’ll have you know,” he whispers, “that I happen to love this library.”

  “Oh, really? Does the quiet solitude do it for you?”

  “No.” He tips his head towards the rows of books behind us. “There’s a great make-out spot in the back corner.”

  A smile wipes out my frown and I only just catch the laughter wanting to break free. I bite my lips together and shake my head at him. “You’re beyond help, you know that?”

  “Yeah, I’ve known that for years, so I just go ahead and embrace it.”

  I poke my tongue into my cheek, trying to ward off the next flashy grin. I don’t want to encourage him.

  But, oh man, I do!

  “So, you stayed.” Mack’s playful charm disappears behind that sweet softness I spotted on Saturday. His dark eyes drink me in, telling me I’m beautiful.

  I swallow and try to look away. But I can’t. My brain is saying one thing but my body’s doing another. I gaze at his gorgeous face. It’s like being soaked in the warm sun on a cold winter’s day.

  “Meet me after school,” he whispers.

  “I can’t.” My response is automatic. I don’t mean it, but fear is making my resolve thick and strong.

  “Yes, you can.” He leans closer. His brown eyes are so dark and intense, like dark cocoa with a hint of chili—my favorite treat. “There’s something between us, Kaija. I don’t know why you’re trying so hard to deny it.”

  My secret r
ears its ugly head, choking me. I can’t swallow past the boulder lodged in my throat.

  The corner of Mack’s mouth twitches, then rises into a half-smile. He rests his elbow on the table, angling his body so all I can see is him. All I can sense is his strength and masculinity—his powerful thighs stretching towards me, his strong arms ready to catch me if I try to bolt. Is it bad that I want them to?

  It should be bad!

  But I want him to. I want him to catch me and never let go.

  Maybe he can make me forget…or pretend that I never did what I did.

  “Thing is…” The tips of his fingers graze down my cheekbone. The delicacy of his touch contradicts the raging impact it has on me—so soft, yet so strong. “I’m used to getting what I want, Kaija. It’s always come so easy, but you… You’ve made me work for it.” He grins. “And I’ve never wanted anything more.”

  I lean away from him, my eyebrows dipping together—one final attempt to capture my resolve. “I’m not something you can just have.”

  “It’s not like…” He closes his eyes and cringes. “I’m explaining myself really badly. You…” He glances at study girl, then shoots out of his chair, gently taking my wrist and pulling me into one of the fiction rows. We stop in front of a line of Harry Potter books and I let him box me in. “I like you. More than I’ve ever liked anybody. You see through my bullshit and you aren’t afraid to call me on it. I need you in my life.”

  “You need me.” His words are doing a number on my insides, but I have to at least scoff at his dramatic statement.

  “Yes, I need you.” His hand is on my face again, cupping my cheek and drawing me in like a moth to a flame. “Because when I’m not with you, I’m thinking about you. Like, all the time. It’s kind of consuming and it’s making me a little crazy.” I’m transfixed by his eyes. They hold me steady. “I want to spend time with you. I want to figure out this power you have over me.”

  “You’re making me sound like a witch,” I whisper. It’s a breathy, pathetic sound that I only just manage to squeak out.

  “Come on.” He flashes me the megawatt version of his charming smile, and I’m embarrassed to admit that it completely owns me. “Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel something too.”

  I don’t have to force myself to do what he asks.

  The only response I have left is to smile and admit, “Okay, so maybe I can’t deny it anymore.”

  His face takes on a triumphant glow. Not the arrogant, cocky one, but the thrilled-to-be-in-this-position one. I’ve just made his freaking day. And he’s about to make mine. The smile slips from his lips, his gaze searching mine. I silently give him permission and he leans towards me. His warm breath skims my skin, accelerating my heart rate and—

  “You two better be searching for something to read.” A sharp voice jolts us apart. With wide eyes, I turn to take in the librarian. She’s a short, rotund woman with a merry—well, usually merry—smile. Right now, she doesn’t look so impressed. Her fist is perched on her hip while her eyes flash us a warning.

  At exactly the same time, Mack and I let out these sheepish, breathy chuckles that do nothing to hide our intent.

  “Get to class.”

  She tips her thumb at the door and we shuffle past her. Mack’s behind me as I start gathering up my books and shoving them into my bag. His hand rests lightly on my lower back when he whispers into my ear. “Meet me on the field after school.”

  And with that, he disappears. So, I’m left with a stomach full of manic butterflies and a resolve that’s no bigger than a dried-up raisin.

  #19:

  The Truth Faucet

  Mack

  Roxy’s leaning against my locker at the end of the school day. Usually, this makes a slow smile creep across my face. A little flirt with Roxy is always fun, but not today. Not when I’m due to meet the most delectable kiwi girl in just a few minutes.

  “Hey, Rox. What’s shakin’?”

  Her smile is stunning. It always has been…and she knows it.

  I clear my throat and tip my head to the side, a subtle way of telling her to move off my locker. She picks up the hint and steps into my space.

  “So, I was thinking.” Her hand lands on my chest, then glides up until she’s playing with the collar of my jacket.

  “Oh yeah?” I try to keep my voice low and distant.

  “The season’s over and it’s getting too cold for the bonfires. I kind of miss it. Don’t you?”

  I work my jaw to the side. “Yeah, the end of the season always sucks.”

  She simpers. Her bright eyes, usually so alluring, have nothing on Kaija’s emeralds. A smile twitches my lips. Roxy misinterprets it, pressing her body against mine. “It doesn’t have to, you know. I’m sure you and I could find an excuse to celebrate something.” Her lips brush my cheek. “Why don’t we go somewhere?”

  I step away from her with a knowing smile. “I don’t think so.”

  “What?” The sharp frown wrinkling her forehead makes her look like a cartoon character.

  I run my hand down her arm, trying to soften her glare. Roxy’s one of those girls the word ‘vengeance’ was invented for. I’m not about to cross her…but I won’t be putting Kaija in the line of fire, either. So I shrug and tell her a big, fat one. “I’m not free today.” I don’t really want to say it, but I tack on, “Maybe some other time.”

  My brush-off goes over okay and she glides past me with a “You can count on it.”

  I clench my jaw as her fingers trail across my back. Glancing to my right, I notice a few sets of eyes on me. They all turn away as I scan the rest of the hallway. It’s like crabs scuttling back into their holes in the sand. I fling my locker open and quickly rearrange the books I need. The sharp bang of my locker closing echoes down the hallway. Hitching my bag onto my shoulder, I turn to head for the field and notice Finn, Colt and Tori heading toward me. I spin on my heel, pick up my pace and duck out of view, going the long way around to get to my date.

  I don’t know why I feel the need to hide it. Maybe I don’t want them tagging along or ruining this for me.

  I don’t want anything to ruin it, which is why the second my Vans hit the grass, I run across to my love-at-first-sight and start talking. “Sorry I’m late. Roxanne Carmichael tried to make a pass at me and I brushed her off, although to soften the blow, I kind of gave her the impression that I might be interested. But I’m actually not. She’s just not the kind of girl you want to cross.”

  By the time I stop, Kaija is giving me one of her bust-my-heart-wide-open smiles. “Hi to you too.”

  I cringe. “Sorry, I just thought you should know. Roxy and I have…” I hiss. “Well, it’s… We kind of sometimes get together and then we… It’s never serious. Just making out, really, but I’m not interested in that anymore and—”

  “You can stop talking now.” She shoves my shoulder and laughs. “I get it. I know the type. You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

  “But I want to. I don’t want anything to come between us.”

  Her face flickers with a frown and I start to worry that I’m coming on too strong. Of course I am! I’m a lovesick weirdo who’s never felt this way before. As much as I hate it, I crave it. This giddy, light-headed thing is a trip. I barely know this girl and she makes me want to be a better version of myself. Other than my dad, no one’s ever stirred that kind of motivation in me.

  I bite my lips together and rub the back of my neck before I’m tempted to say all that out loud.

  “So…” Kaija spreads her hands wide and does a slow spin. “Is this your place of worship?”

  I snicker and gaze across the vibrant, green grass, the clean-cut white lines, the field that’s absorbed my sweat, my blood—my soul—for the last four years. It’s strange how nostalgic I feel. I haven’t even left yet but the idea of never running onto this field with a Raiders uniform on again makes me feel a combination of sadness and relief.

  Kaija’s long locks f
all over her shoulder as she tips her head to study me. Her green eyes tighten at the corners. “Wow, I’ve seen that look before.”

  “What look?” My eyes round slightly, my hands diving into my jacket pockets.

  “Usually when you talk sports with the captain of a team, they start going on about how amazing it is and how they can’t wait to take it further. But you…” She points at me. “You look like you could walk away at any second.”

  How the hell did she see that?

  I swallow and shake my head. “No, I’m excited. I mean, I’m supposed to be signing with the Boise State Broncos. In February, I’ll give them my letter of intent, and then I’ll go on to follow in my father’s footsteps.”

  “He pressuring you into it?” Kaija crosses her arms, her keen eyes sparking.

  “Uh…no. He’s, um… He’s dead.” My jaw works to the side and I have to glance into the empty stands to hide the emotion tearing through me. Even after all this time, it still hurts to say it.

  Kaija rushes over to me and touches my arm, her long fingers gliding down to my elbow. “I’m so sorry.”

  That’s what everyone says, but somehow from her, it’s a comfort. It gives me the courage to look into her eyes. They’re swimming with a heartfelt compassion that pulls the truth right out of my mouth.

  “He died of cancer when I was in middle school. I threw everything into the game. It was the only way I could deal with it. Playing made me feel closer to him, but I don’t know…” I sigh, fisting the side of my hair. “I just… I don’t know if I want to make it my life, you know? Everyone expects it, though. If I don’t sign…” I shake my head with a sharp huff, picturing my mother’s crushed expression and my team’s confusion.

  This is so not going the way I’d spent most of my day imagining. I wanted to have some fun with this girl, not expose my soul. I haven’t voiced this shit to anyone, because there’s nothing I can do about it.

  Kaija’s gaze penetrates my shield, burning a hole right through to my core. Her wide lips form a sweet smile that I want to etch into my memory. “My eldest brother, Mitchell, was one of those naturally talented athletes, just like you. My dad has been involved with rugby his whole life. He coached for years and is now the sports director of a private school in Auckland. Anyway, he was super keen for Mitch to take it all the way. I think he could have been an All Black if he’d really wanted to, but…he didn’t.” Her eyebrows rise as she obviously relives a memory. “When he told Dad he was giving up the game to focus on his studies, I’ve never heard our house so quiet. Everyone sat around that table totally shell-shocked.” She chuckles. “Dad came around eventually, and Mitch is close to graduating with a degree in medicine. He wants to be a sports doctor.”